Interrupting or Talking Over Others: ADHD and Conversation Guilt
You’re in the middle of a lively conversation, and before you realize it, you’ve blurted out a thought while your friend is still talking. They pause, maybe look a little annoyed, and instantly, guilt creeps in: Why do I always do this? Why can’t I just wait my turn?
If you live with ADHD, this might sound familiar. Interrupting or talking over others is one of the most common—and most misunderstood—social challenges. Here’s the important truth: it’s not about being rude. It’s about impulsivity and excitement. ADHD brains move fast, and the thought of losing what you wanted to say can feel unbearable.
Why It Happens
ADHD affects impulse control and working memory. So, when an idea sparks, your brain says: Say it now, or it’s gone forever. That urgency isn’t a lack of respect; it’s a wiring difference. But repeated interruptions can leave friends or coworkers frustrated, and can leave you feeling ashamed.
ADHD-Friendly Tips to Try
1. Use a pause trick.
Before speaking, take one deep breath. This tiny pause gives your brain a beat to notice: is the other person finished?
2. Jot it down.
Keep a small notepad or use your phone to quickly type what you want to say. This way, you don’t lose your thought, and you give the other person space to finish.
3. Practice active listening.
Repeat back what you’ve heard in your head (or even aloud with a simple, “So you’re saying…”). This grounds you in their words instead of racing to your own.
4. Be transparent.
Sometimes, honesty helps: “Hey, I get so excited I didn’t mean to talk over you, .” Most people respond with understanding when they know the why.
5. Offer repair.
If you do interrupt, a quick, “Oops, sorry, please finish!” goes a long way. Repair builds trust and shows you care about connection, not just speaking.
A Compassionate Reminder
Interrupting doesn’t mean you’re selfish or inconsiderate. It means your brain is wired for speed and enthusiasm. With practice, tools, and compassion, you can balance your eagerness to connect with respect for others’ space.
And remember: the very trait that makes you prone to jumping in—your passion—can also make you a deeply engaging and energetic friend. It’s about learning to channel it, not erase it.
